Ephesians 5:22-33 (AMP)
22 Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord.
23 For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church, Himself the Savior of [His] body.
24 As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
26 So that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word,
27 That He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things [that she might be holy and faultless].
28 Even so husbands should love their wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself.
29 For no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and carefully protects and cherishes it, as Christ does the church,
30Because we are members (parts) of His body.
31For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.
32 This mystery is very great, but I speak concerning [the relation of] Christ and the church.
33 However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly]. [1 Pet. 3:2.]
Men are like dogs:
Both good and bad.
On the bad side, we’re stinky, kind of gross, and we’re destructive. If you leave us alone and unattended we’ll break things, digs holes, chew things up, and just make an all around huge mess. If there is a stray dog running through the neighborhood, we’ll probably find her.
On the good side, thing of us as that adorable beagle who will chase the ball all day long, even unto and beyond the point of total exhaustion. You throw it into the water, and he will jump in swim 100 yards out, grab it and while trying not to drown, swim bag, and drop it at your feet, and in total exhaustion wag it’s tail and hope you’ll throw the ball again. All it really wants you to do is pat it on the head and say good dog. That’s really all it wants, is to be loved and be told “good doggy”.
But when that little dog comes up to you and drops the ball in front of you desperately wanting you to play with you, to please you, to enjoy spending his life with you and you kick him. Pretty soon that dog is going to sheepishly walk up to you, wondering if he is going to get kicked this time, or if she’s going to throw the ball for him, since he really desperately yearns to play ball with her, he’s willing to take that chance. She then proceeds to kick him again, and pretty soon that dog is going to have one of two reactions. He is either going to bite you back out of anger, frustration and hurt, or he’s going to put his tail between his legs and he’s going to run to the farthest place he can find from you in the corner of the yard and hide, and when you call his name, he’s not going to come anymore. What started out as a happy, bumbling, loveable, cuddly, wanting to do nothing but please you man, becomes a scared, intimidated, fearful, rejected, beat up guy, that has come to the point where he decides it not worth the effort.
Women are like a flower:
Like a flower in the middle of a garden, that if not cherished, loved, watered, and being taken care will begin to wilt. The flower wants nothing more than to reach up to the sun, and display its beauty and radiance, so as to be a joy to the gardener. When that flower is not tended for and cared for, and the weeds begin to encroach upon the flower, and they begin to rob the flower of its nutrients from the soil and to block the sun, then the flower begins to wilt, and very shortly the flower will die. And sadly those are the eyes of far too many women. The ones who have tried desperately for years, to be loved by their husband, their gardener, that they too on their wedding day vowed to love and cherish until the day they die. Now their eyes rather than being glowing and shimmering with light and beauty, are sad, depressed, bitter, hurt, and angry.
The key to living in marriage as Ephesians 5 says is learning to forgive. Instead of wanting the other person to hurt for the things they have done to you, and just giving them a cursory “I forgive you” to be polite while you store the hurt for future use against them. You must come to a point of true forgiveness; you must understand each others feelings, and desires, not just mind read and assume. You don’t need to necessarily agree on everything, but you must agree that you will do your best to make sure your partner feels loved and heard. You must shut you mouth, and truly listen. This approach can save a marriage; even one which society believes looks perfectly normal and healthy, and return it to God’s true plan for you and your spouse.
